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Now That’s What I Call Crap: Music Detritus That Needs To Go

Submitted by on June 13, 2010 – 8:40 amNo Comment

Sometimes one man’s junk is just, well, junk.

Zambaleta, a Mission-based nonprofit world music and dance school, hosted a flea market last Saturday for musical equipment and records. People sometimes regret throwing out music and memorabilia when nostalgia hits 40 years down the line and Davy Jones’ face is just a distant memory. But here are five things I would happily sell to some unassuming music fan — without any risk of remorse.

1. J-14 magazine pullouts of Chris Kirkpatrick and Joey Fatone from *NSYNC. If Justin Timberlake is included, keep.

2. Any NOW That’s What I Call Music CDs newer than the first five. If they aren’t current, and they aren’t from way back, they should get gone. Now.

3. Eiffel 65 CDs. You’re blue, da ba dee. We got it. That, and years of giant blue headaches.

4. Anything from artists whose names are prefaced by “Lil.” (That includes Bow Wow, Romeo and Wayne.)

5. This album from the future (this July!), because if you do get it, you’ll inevitably toss it one day: Kidz Bop 18, the CD of pop songs sung by kids for kids. The second track is a kid-sung version of Justin Bieber’s “Baby.” Yes, they really felt the need to re-record that one.

Now if only someone would take me out of my misery and buy my soundtrack toPokemon: The First Movie. (Takers? Anybody?) How much longer will I be forced to relive that low point in my childhood when I sat by myself in a movie theater and watched Pokemon clones fight to the tune of Aaron Carter? The mere memory makes me want to lock myself in the car, turn up Radio Disney, and cry.

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Gotta get rid of ‘em all

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